LTD Reveals BRT Test Driver Program
Informants to the Joe Hill LTD Project has learned of a new secret plan for LTD.
Ham is Back! Ham made headlines across the world in 1960 by being the first occupant of a Mercury capsule launched into space by the United States. LTD in their quest to look for ways catch the eye of the public in the coming wasteful BRT project have asked the famous chimpanzee to come out of retirement to start test driving the first arrival of the BRT vehicle. By special agreement with NASA, the FTA and LTD and oddly the publisher of Dr. Suess's Children Books (who owned the rights to Ham since the publishing of Green Eggs and Ham.)
Ham Comes out of Retirement
Ken Hamm (no relationship) was gleeful with the announcement. "It is not often that you can get a celebrity and a national hero to take up a cause like BRT." Ham will be our first driver on the BRT system. As you know we have sought a new and different classification for BRT Drivers and this announcement today shows the reasons for this bargaining demand."
Mark Pangborn joined Ken Hamm in welcoming Ham. "I have said for years that trained monkeys could do this job and now I ...I mean LTD will be able to demonstrate that to everyone." "The best part is they are non-union because they are non-human. They don't really have any legal rights except the anti cruelty to animals laws. Those aren't nearly as hard to beat .. I mean... meet as those governing employment of people." LTD is said to be working on a partnership agreement with Green Hill for the housing and maintenance of Ham and his future colleagues.
LTD GM Ken Hamm fore shaddowed that employees will sit up and pay attention to our recruitment of Ham. "We have Mary Neidig calling around to Chimpanzee Rescue and Retirement facilities nationwide in the event of any work stoppage at LTD."
Al Zullo contacted about the plan just revealed by LTD said "Those guys are bananas!" "This is just like all the other management schemes to cut workers and reduce costs at the expense of workers". If this happens we will be filing an Unfair Labor Practice on the never tried inter species infringement theory. "We will go all the way to the Supreme Court on this on," said Zullo. Hamm's response was the same as Ham's response "ooooh, ooooh aaaah, aaaah aaaah ooooh."
Reported by Nigel Buckworth, Joe Hill LTD Project Reporter
International Writers Guild - Nairobi Local 11064-Az17q
Ken Hamm (no relationship) was gleeful with the announcement. "It is not often that you can get a celebrity and a national hero to take up a cause like BRT." Ham will be our first driver on the BRT system. As you know we have sought a new and different classification for BRT Drivers and this announcement today shows the reasons for this bargaining demand."
Mark Pangborn joined Ken Hamm in welcoming Ham. "I have said for years that trained monkeys could do this job and now I ...I mean LTD will be able to demonstrate that to everyone." "The best part is they are non-union because they are non-human. They don't really have any legal rights except the anti cruelty to animals laws. Those aren't nearly as hard to beat .. I mean... meet as those governing employment of people." LTD is said to be working on a partnership agreement with Green Hill for the housing and maintenance of Ham and his future colleagues.
LTD GM Ken Hamm fore shaddowed that employees will sit up and pay attention to our recruitment of Ham. "We have Mary Neidig calling around to Chimpanzee Rescue and Retirement facilities nationwide in the event of any work stoppage at LTD."
Al Zullo contacted about the plan just revealed by LTD said "Those guys are bananas!" "This is just like all the other management schemes to cut workers and reduce costs at the expense of workers". If this happens we will be filing an Unfair Labor Practice on the never tried inter species infringement theory. "We will go all the way to the Supreme Court on this on," said Zullo. Hamm's response was the same as Ham's response "ooooh, ooooh aaaah, aaaah aaaah ooooh."
Reported by Nigel Buckworth, Joe Hill LTD Project Reporter
International Writers Guild - Nairobi Local 11064-Az17q
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